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Blessings in Solitude

“Wisdom is enshrined in the hearts of men of common sense, but it must shout loudly before fools will hear it.” (Proverbs 14:33)

Though I’m still shouting at the television screen on a nightly basis while both Democrats and Republicans dither over partisan agendas, instead of putting cash into the hands of the American people and small businesses to help them make it through this pandemic, I’m actually enjoying the solitude. If you look in the dictionary under “introvert”, I’m pretty sure my picture is sitting there beside it. My dream home is a small cabin out in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nature.

For the moment, I’m making do with an early-20th century fixer-upper sitting alongside a major interstate in rural Connecticut.

When this whole shutdown started, I checked out a stack of novels for Mom and I to read. I’ve read two. The other two, well, I’m sure I’ll get to them sooner or later. Instead I’ve been going through a lot of paperwork. Isn’t it amazing how it piles up over time? I’ve cleaned my office, my bedroom and rearranged them both. Ditto for my workout space. Next is the bathroom…and that pile of bags and boxes that have been sitting outside the bathroom in the hallway since my Auntie Marjorie died several years’ ago. Most of it can be shredded. They’re old rent receipts and telephone bills. There are also some stuffed animals; it’s about time they went to a shelter…when it’s safe to make such contact with the world again. The kitchen could use some re-organizing, too. And I’m contemplating a major purge of all the unnecessary bric-a-brac that also tends to pile up over time. The idea is to keep one gift from each person. If I have multiple gifts from the same person, I’m choosing the one I love the most and putting the rest into a yard sale. Going minimalist has been a long time in coming.

As for the homestead itself, we’ve had lots of rain, and even a snow storm yesterday, so outside work has been curtailed. The snow has already melted. My Mom would call it a season breaker. She says it’s God’s way of purifying the earth of this scourge, the coronavirus. I hope she’s right. Her anxiety disorder has been through the roof with this pandemic, especially with so many reports that people over 60 are likely not to be treated as there aren’t enough ventilators for everyone.

The biggest blessing is being home together in all of this. We’ve been having Scrabble tournaments. And, at night, though it’s a break in Lenten vows, we’ve been watching all of the uploaded videos from Crufts’ 2020 dog show on YouTube. My favorite is the agility competitions. When I’m back on my feet again financially, I’m hoping for a few Border Collies of my own to train in agility…and, if I can finally swing it, the herding of sheep.

Of course, that will probably require more land for the latter. For now, I’ll be happy with the Border Collies and an agility course–my plans for the half-acre that has been completely overgrown for years.

That’s the other blessing right now: being able to relax, just a little, and to dream. Because I’m one of the fortunate ones who is still getting paid, despite being out of work, it’s different than last year’s fall and subsequent convalesce. I just sent off the electric bill, paid the Internet, the car insurance and the car loan. We’re well stocked with 300 lbs. of poultry feed (a month’s supply), 50 lbs. of both goat and rabbit chow, 14 bales of hay, and 5 cases of cat food. We had just done our month’s grocery shopping a week or so before this hit and I stocked up on a few more bags of frozen vegetables, tea, sugar, cereals, etc last week. We won’t starve. The only thing marring the peace is the mortgage payments that are overdue…and the threat of foreclosure that still looms. But one thing at a time. There are so many who are worse off than we are right now. And, so far, nobody I know has come down with this coronavirus. Though it is a serious situation, a part of me is giving myself permission to relax, to think, to dream, to write…and who knows? Maybe with this extended breather, maybe all the noise and chaos of day-to-day life will quiet enough that I can finally hear Him speak to my heart and show me His will for me in this situation.

In the meantime, I give thanks for these blessings, for the quality time with Mom, my pets and livestock, for the phone calls, emails, text messages, and even an Easter card that came in the mail from friends I haven’t seen in ages. I give thanks for being slightly ahead on the bulk of this household’s expenses…and for our continued good health. And I give thanks for everyone reading this blog, the friends/acquaintances I have made through it. I pray that each and every one of you stays safe and healthy through this worrisome time. He’s got this. He truly does.

May God bless you & keep you!

2 thoughts on “Blessings in Solitude”

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